I'm worried about myself today. The day started the way it usually does: Molly coughing and waking up because her asthma is a little worse in the mornings and yelling across the hall: "Daddy, I need a wee wee on the toilet" 6.05am on the dot - like most mornings. As I was awake I went into her and took her to the loo. After she'd been, instead of taking her into the lounge and starting the day I persuaded her it was still night time with "Look sweetheart, it's still dark outside. If mummy comes into your bed, will you cuddle me back to sleep" which worked a treat. 3 hours later she awoke again and we were all grateful for the lie-in. (I managed to sleep despite being shoe-horned into a single bed surrounded by stuffed animals with a coughing, wriggling toddler sleeping next to me who appeared to have about 68 elbows). So the day started serenely and this carried on all morning. Gareth didn't feel up to going to church because his leg was still aching (old injury, long story) so we all got ready at our leisure. I drove Mol and me to the swimming pool which is our usual Sunday morning thing while Gareth does the church-thing. Molly was unusually well behaved so we had a lovely time splashing about in the pool. Perfect Sunday .... until we got back to the car and I saw how my drivers side door had been totally blocked in by the car in the parking bay next to me. Apart from the fact that it was a 4x4 (don't get me started on those cars - fine for those living down country lanes but this car didn't have a splash of mud on it) it was parked well over the lines, at an odd angle and made it impossible for me to get into my car. All the serenity from the morning disappeared in a flash of red fury. I was incandescent with rage! I put Molly in her seat (luckily on the other side of the car) and grabbed my handbag. I always have a pen on me and found some scrap paper in my less than tidy car. I penned a message to the idiot who'd "parked" their car next to mine and put it under their wiper. I'm managed to climb over the passenger seat and drove off.
The message read: "The next time you park your car, please check that you have left enough room for the driver to get into the car parked next to you. I had to climb over the passenger seat to get into my car - not easy when you're pregnant. You inconsiderate prat!"
Now ... admittedly I'm not pregnant. But I COULD be! I could have been disabled, Molly's car seat could have been over that side ... there are a lot of "could haves". I just wanted them to feel guilty for just one moment. Maybe get them to think of others the next time they leave their car. I needed to teach someone a lesson. But why? What made me do that? I could have just tutted, rolled my eyes and got on with it. I could have gone the other way and taken their wing mirror off and carved obscenities into their paintwork with my keys ... but I wouldn't do something like that anyway. Too chicken!! And too honest!
But it's made me think about myself .... what was I hoping to achieve by doing that? Why would my note make any difference in how they go about their daily activities?
It's dawned on me how I interact with the world. I want people to worry as much as I do. I worry about the world, about how we all go through our lives in bubbles, not caring about our fellow man and thinking "I'm alright Jack, sod the rest of you." I hate social injustices and demand equality of opportunity for all. The Bride of Satan (aka Maggie Thatcher) once said "There's no such thing as society" and in one statement, communities were atomized and we all starting living in bubbles. The yuppy culture was spawned and consumerism consumed us all.
Consideration is therefore the key. If we consider how our actions or inactions affect others and act accordingly, surely the world would be a slightly more hospitable place?
So, I watched Molly looking at me as if I was mental while I angrily wrote this message but I think she needs to see me doing things like that. She needs to be raised knowing that small actions can change the world, if we all acted this way, those who behaved inconsiderately would live in a world that didn't tolerate this sort of behaviour and may moderate the way in which they go about their daily activities with more consideration to others. I didn't damage their car or embarrass myself or her by tracking this person down in the leisure centre and give them a verbal bashing ... but I did something small. I got even. I drove off feeling like I'd done something and kept my dignity at the same time. The note probably will be screwed up in a bin somewhere or being blown around with the rest of the litter in the leisure centre car park, but hopefully the words would have had some impact on this person. ... Who knows .... ?
